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7 Things I Learned in 2020

7 Things I Learned in 2020

January 20, 2021

At the beginning of each year, I look back on the previous year to see what worked, what didn’t, and what I can take from all of my experiences to make the most of the present. This process helps to hold me accountable so that I can more fully show up in my life and business.

I don’t rush into the “new year, new year” BS. The Gregorian calendar is out of sync with nature’s rhythms and is part of the Matrix control system, keeping human consciousness trapped – but more on this in another post!

Intentions are how I choose to live and set them with distinct words each year in place of a “resolution.” These words guide my choices and actions for the upcoming year. My hope is that these lessons learned are also helpful to you.

Here are my words for the past decade:

2011: Creativity, Connection, Mindfulness.

2012: Mindfulness, Spontaneity, Simplicity.

2013: Build. Track. Focus.

2014: Free. Alive. Expand (along with the 10 things I learned in 2014).

2015: Grace.

2016: 8 Things I learned in 2016

2017: Rebirth (along with 6 Things I Learned in 2017).  

2018: Curiosity and Efficiency (along with the 11 Things I Learned in 2018 and the 50 Books I Read in 2018)

2019: Joy (along with 7 Things I Learned in 2019 and the 11 Books I read in 2019)

2020: Purity and Light (and the 30 Books I Read)

Here are the 7 Things I Learned in 2020:

1. External chaos is the manifestation of internal chaos.

At the beginning of this year, I watched the movie Annihilation with Natalie Portman. This movie has stayed with me since I first saw it almost a year ago. It is symbolic for what was to transpire in 2020 and I experienced a bit of a meltdown after watching it (now I see that it was a foreshadowing). The movie tackles depression, grief, and the human propensity for self-destruction. Here is an IG Live about the symbolism of this movie back in the oh-so-innocent time of February 2020.

Our world’s current state is a symbol for a much deeper infection, the virus of the mind. It literally cultivates and feeds on fear and separation. But synchronicities can snap us out of the collective spell of hypnosis and helplessness. The more you are tuned into the synchronistic matrix that’s informing the Universe, the more it manifests in a feedback loop that’ll wake you up instead of keeping you asleep. I interviewed Paul Levy about this here.

As Krishnamurti once said, “It is no measure of health to be well-adjusted to a profoundly sick society.” 2020 has opened our eyes to the injustice and sickness that pervades society. It is only through the deep inner work that we can recalibrate our planet and uplift its frequency.

Healing yourself heals the world and creates a better society (I discuss this topic in-depth with Jim Rutt here).

2. I’m fascinated with how fascinated I am with how much I don’t know what I don’t know.

There’s always a deeper layer to the simulation that has yet to be revealed. like Oz behind the curtain, things are different than what we are told. ⁣⁣

We repeat cliches and “facts” in a somnambulistic state thinking we are “smart” or “awake” while living in a dream within a dream, a mechanical slumber.⁣⁣

⁣⁣Our ontology (sense of reality), ideology (sense of what a good society is) and sense of self (the social construction of an ego) are all Being challenged. Without gripping onto who you think you Are, can you Listen and look deeper? ⁣

2020 has invited me to contemplate: Can you protect the boundaries of your symbolic universe without telling others how to live? ⁣⁣

Western and Eastern Esotericism has taught, both subtly and obviously, that our bodies, planet, solar system, and universe are essentially circuits. ALL studies point to this “old” knowledge becoming more and more true in the world we now live in. But Western medicine doesn’t want us to know.

In my most popular interview of 2020, I interviewed Dr. Jack Kruse on optimal health and why we need to be careful who packs our parachute.

3. Podcasting is a Path to Awakening

I realize I’m presenting a lot of uncomfortable Truths. It doesn’t mean that I see darkness everywhere. It means that the Light can only win when it integrates with the dark portions of Itself.

Transmuting my tears of sadness + loneliness into tears of purity and Light has been my 2020 superpower.

Here I can access a cosmic force beyond logical comprehension. Grace, I finally understand Her as she shows herself to me, raw in the quiet light. ⁣⁣
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Over the years, I’ve learned to dance with darkness. I bend backward into its pulsations, feeling it in new ways, adding a different dimension to who and what I Am. thank you, darkness, for the invite to Stay Human. and to practice what I pose. ⁣⁣⁣⁣

I’m all about the Light but if we can’t simultaneously see the dark to every situation, we will stay in the one-dimensional, black vs. white timeline. It is a pure timeline but also naive. After all, subconscious intentions are often not known until retrospect. When we become aware of the Light and the Dark, the sacred and the profane, we realize that a reality exists beyond individuals’ deliberate actions.

I’m not sure if this reality is coordinated or random, but it seems synchronistic and Beyond this dimension. As a human trying to discern good vs. evil, I don’t always have the answers. But as part of my experiential process, I entertain realities outside of my comfort zone. And have learned to stay away from people who think I am arguing every time I try to express myself (mental health 101).

In this terrific article, “Let’s Put the Straw Man of Pandemic Denial Out of His Misery” the authors plead:

We must stop labelling every valid disagreement as denial, which tends to censor legitimate differences of opinion.

Social media today seems to have divided us further, perpetuating our differences. And podcasting seems like it’s one of the rare few solutions during these times:

Podcasting is a path to awakening because it broadcasts at a different frequency. ⁣

I have always had the drive to seek out the Truth of myself and of the world. But it wasn’t until I started my podcast and mentoring other podcasters in my program that I could *finally* access a Truth not based in opinion or fear⁣⁣.

I share more about Podcasting as a Path to Awakening on my student’s podcasts:

Going Conscious with Nikki Trott

BEING with Patrick Cooke and

the Wisdom of the Body with Heather Grzych

I also moderate a panel on Clubhouse on this topic every Wednesday at 1pm PST. Follow me there: @beingishuman.

Shout out the podcasters who are having uncomfortable conversations with nuance, planting the seeds of awareness from fertile soil. ⁣⁣Here’s to the podcasters who are reframing the narrative. Here’s to the Light broadcasting to the tune of a higher love.

4. The Matrix was a documentary.

After working inside the belly of the beast in Washington, DC for a decade, I have let go a lot of the ego that tied me to the “news junky” identity. It’s no secret that most of it is a facade designed to keep humanity at a lower frequency. And I am now seeing my naivety through a new lens.

Predictive programming is happening on a deep level. The disorienting thing is that it’s been right in front of our eyes all along. Hollywood is mind control/predictive programming and the media perpetuates it with propaganda.

Collectively we all need to Be like Neo, embracing the deep sense of thrill that comes as we progressively face our demons and do shadow work.

It’s not easy.

“Discover yourself; otherwise you have to depend on other people’s opinions who don’t know themselves.” – Osho

There are some uncomfortable truths that we are now waking up to and believe me…I’ve wanted to look away many times.

Most of humanity is suffering from “perpetual people pleaser” syndrome. ⁣⁣

The Truth is that people can only meet you as deeply as they have met themselves. ⁣⁣
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But when you do The Work, you start to live in a different energetic vibration. From this octave, you learn to respect your rhythms and your inner landscape. You learn to set boundaries and find personal sovereignty. ⁣

From Here, a beautiful Higher Consciousness shines through.

Red pill, anyone? 💊

5. Science without philosophy is dangerous.

According to Haluk Berkmen, former Retired Professor of Physics, science and philosophy were intertwined and indistinguishable many years ago. This is why you are accepted as being an expert in the field when you get a PhD. PhD means “Philosophy Doctor.” Philosophy is not entertainment, it is a serious investigation of social as well as human values and a pursuit of wisdom. It tries to elaborate on the subjects of aesthetics, ethics, epistemology and ontology.

However, today it’s no secret that scientists will deny what they see if it conflicts with their reasoning. And if you stand outside the status quo in your thinking, you are canceled.

2020 is asking us to bridge both worlds: science and philosophy.

Science without unconditional love and light is blind.

Philosophy without unconditional love and consciousness is empty.

People centuries from now will look back at 21st century societies and wonder how we could ever be so stupid.

But there’s hope…

In the study of consciousness, there’s a theory known as “panpsychism” Panpsychism sounds crazy but it’s also most probably right: It is the theory that posits that consciousness is not confined to biological entities but is a fundamental feature of all physical matter—from subatomic particles to the human brain. In Galileo’s Error, author Philip Goff provides the first step on a new path to the final theory of human consciousness. In one of the most-read stories in Scientific American in 2020, Philip Goff explains this concept in-detail and we discuss it in our episode here.

As humans, we evolve through a series of stages. This matters for the happiness and survival of us all.

6. Much of what we’re seeing in our collective “reality” is stored trauma presenting our shadows, waiting to be recognized and healed.

We are a culture built on years of trauma. And there’s no amount of “marketing” that will heal this. We need to become inside-out brands: brands who have compassion and empathy baked into their business model. Brands who can show up and do the difficult work of creating personal art will thrive.
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“Success” in marketing is not about sales funnels or targeted ads or an influencer promoting your product (even though my company does all of the above 🙋‍♀️ ) ⁣⁣
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Humanizing your brand is about alignment with your core values, finding your frequency, and communicating from this space of authenticity. ⁣⁣
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It’s 100% an inside job. ⁣⁣

Just as we are Being led to purge unconscious behavior and let go of false levels of comfort in our personal lives, it’s happening in the business worlds too.⁣⁣ ⁣This is the greatest hour: We are being asked to anchor as a zero point field for the well-being of All. This new strength is Being released right now onto Earth, I feel it radiating through me every moment of the day. ⁣⁣⁣⁣It’s Here to heal, renew, and bring greater clarity for the days ahead. I wrote a poem about this here.

7. Being is our Birthright.

Mystical experiences have been pretty much denied and treated as irrelevant in our cult-ure. But we are now recognizing a part of our being that we had never known before, something deep within us that’s not separated from the universe. So much of our behavior has been based on the desire to alleviate the pain from our own separateness. In a world that tells you to Do, Do, Do…I am deeply humbled when I just allow myself to “Be” and receive. I am open to more. I surrender and embrace all of it as it is. I’m no longer trying to move everything at once. I am allowing the current to take me and let the ocean carry me.

The state of Being beckons when I’m barefaced in nature with my hair in a high-bun. Not having looked in the mirror all day, I glimpse something immutable, something that Is Beyond. A luminous intimation. A sacred access into the mystery of our history.⁣⁣⁣
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Truth is Here at every turning point, under the skin we’re in. When we real eyes that Being is Human. and Divinity looks different ⁣⁣on everyone. ⁣⁣⁣
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Just as a spiral staircase rises in the forest in the presence of fauna, we can cultivate creative tension expressing another dimension. As we bask in Eternity Beyond what we see.

And with that, I end on my words for 2021:

Trust, Community and Magick

Thank you for reading and Being along with me on this journey!

Subscribe to my musings here.
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